Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts

Friday, September 5, 2008

Bedside Challenge

I decided to take on the challenge that Dilling accepted recently here to post a photo of her night stand without cleaning or tidying it first. Thanks to CindyDianne for the challenge.

First off, I'm a little disgusted at the dust on and under my night stand. I'm going to tidy that up today!


So here it is. Mid-century modern in style. Like Dilling, I use a battery operated clock. Leftover from my working outside the home days. I now care very little about what time it actually is. I love that it isn't lit unless you want it to be.

I have a picture of my dog with some of his friends in the back of a pickup on the way home from a hike. 

As you can see, I'm currently reading the biography of Prince Charles circa 1979. It must have been a disappointment to write the book just before his dating and engagement to Diana but the book is a witty one and I'm enjoying it thus far. I love to read and always have a couple books next to the bed at the ready. Biographies are of particular interest to me. I see in the photo a copy of Raffi's book Child Honouring which is a really great book. I also keep my diary next to the bed. After my kids are asleep it's an easy time for me to catch up on some entries.

You might be wondering what's hanging over the drawer of my night stand. Those are diapers. Even though my son is dry overnight and doesn't wear them in the day I'm super paranoid about soiling the mattress so I kept the diapers next to the bed. Which also explains the flannel sheet folded in half and stretched across the upper half of my bed. Not only is it good protection but it's soft to sleep on as well. 

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Sore Sight

I don't like to drive often but needed to do a big grocery shop this morning at the Thrifty's downtown. Sitting at the intersection of Victoria Crescent and Nicol Street waiting for the light to change offers a sad sight. So many "shady" characters hanging out next to the highway on the same strip of grass that announces "Welcome to Nanaimo" or some such sign. It was hard to see the sign past the shopping carts. Skinny young gangster types obviously hooked on crystal and who's bodies are so ruined by drugs and street life that they can barely walk like they are younger than ninety years old. Unshaven men who look older than they probably are seem as if their only drive to go elsewhere is if they're told to move on and women who may have been beautiful long ago, covered with scabs and barely clothed giving every man they walk by a come hither smile. The New Hope Centre is supposed to discourage the lounging around on that strip of grass but it seems every time I walk by it's littered with people and the garbage they leave behind. 

The homelessness issue is one I feel so conflicted by. There are many people out on the street with mental illness who have little other option since taking care of themselves is obviously not feasible. There are many others out there who are there thanks to drug addictions. I'm sure there are even a few who are out there because they have no where else to go. Difficult home lives and the like. What can be done? What is being done already to help with this problem? I have to scratch my head when some suggest the police "do something" about it. Being homeless isn't against the law. 

The housing initiatives I've read about happening in Nanaimo over the next few years have me asking more questions. For one are they going to be placed all over Nanaimo? Many of the people that need housing need to get away from the downtown area and the life they've know for so long. They need a new perspective. Many people on the street need mental health assistance. These people aren't able to be independent. Is there going to be appropriate housing for these people?

I'm not sure how I feel about too many "low barrier" style housing options. I'd like to think that the bulk of the new housing goal is to help people get a step closer to breaking free from homelessness, drugs, crime or whatever their personal problems associated with being homeless are and getting people independent and contributing to the quality of their own lives. I guess I hope that it goes beyond putting a simple roof over their heads.

I would feel so much less contempt for some of these people if they weren't littering (garbage, needles...) or generally showing minimal concern for the community that cares about enjoying where we live. I suppose many of them would show more care and concern if they were less looked down upon and ignored. Quite the conundrum. 

A big part of me wonders why no one cares to think more about why people are becoming homeless in the first place? Why the appropriate mental health professionals are coming up with evaluations for individuals just barely above what's deemed needing full time care? I mostly wonder though why we put so little thought as a society into supporting families in raising children into becoming mentally healthy, stable individuals who care about their community and other people. 

Mainstream parenting these days seems to push children away to make them "independent" despite the fact that they are children and in every way need to feel dependant on their parents or guardians. A baby who came from the most intimate of places- inside our womb is born and placed in a barred box in a room down the hall, away from the comfort of our arms. We have devises like bucket car seats and swings to put our children in so we don't even have to hold them. There are self feeding bottles so you needn't be troubled with being near when they are hungry. Schedules and control are central to many parenting practices. This teaches our children not to trust themselves or their parents. Many parents aren't even raising their own children because of the "need" for a second income. Older children and teens quickly decide that their peers are their real family. How frightening is this? That they rely on one another for emotional support and growth. How can you mature if what you strive to be like is the same age and maturity level as yourself?

I propose a great deal of societies problems could be solved by trying to focus on families now. Endorse back to the basics, sensible and natural parenting practises and perhaps teaching families skills like how to cook basic, nutritious yet appetising whole foods meals and other ways to make staying home with your children affordable and generally helping families to thrive.

There are studies done that say the most important years in a person's life are the first three. That how the child is raised and treated during this time can determine what kind of person they could become. Having their needs met in these early years can make it easier for these children to one day meet their own needs and other's later in life. I read one study (and damn it if I could find it now!) in which convicts were questioned about their upbringing and virtually all had difficult and dysfunctional family situations often including abuse. 

It's easier for me to feel compassionate for these people when I recognise the many reasons that they are out there. 

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

TV Follow Up

I swear I won't go on and on about tv but this is a hilarious comic that needed to be shared!

Monday, June 9, 2008



One of my favourite things to do when I'm walking around town is to look at houses. I particularly love old heritage homes, but really any house is fair game when it comes my 'constructive critiquing'. "What the heck were they thinking when painting that house pepto PINK and all those odd additions... tsk tsk... They really should address the water damage thanks to all the stucco." 

The one thing that stands out to me the most is when TV's are placed in front of big picture windows in living rooms. I've seen so many ranging from giant flat screen tvs to smaller box tvs nestled in those big rectangular entertainment units. I've even see more than one tv plus equipment piled up in front of a window. These people really don't want to beat around the bush when it comes to their priorities. Why look outside when you can look at the TV? Who needs sunlight anyway when the tv emits perfectly good radiation over everything day and night?

I actually find it disturbing, although pretty standard to be walking in the evening and seeing house after house with tvs flickering away. When the tv isn't conveniently placed in front of the window you can usually see everyone in the family sitting perfectly still as the picture reflects off their faces. I suppose this is a much better sight than seeing the flickering of tvs in each room with the family separate from each other. I'm often surprised when normally intelligent, motivated people are drawn in and completely consumed by tacky low grade television, they've likely seen before, for hours at a time. 

How many people out there don't even own a tv anymore? Why is cable considered a "need" for people of lower income? How can it even fit into some people's budget? The most basic of cable is $32.95 a month. That's almost $400 a year of time wasting mind suck! How much do you spend on cable tv? 

There are many article out there that would caution against letting young children even watch tv. Just to name a few: Infants weaned on tv cannot concentrate, Too Much TV Can Have Negative Impact on Children, TV Has Negative Impact On Very Young Children's Learning AbilitiesTrash Your TV.... 

What happened to getting outside after supper in the evenings to sit on the porch or out for a stroll? Can you imagine conversations with family and friends in the evenings or games being played? How about a quiet book to feed and relax your mind? 

I say do like the bumper says and: